My Vanity? My Rules
by zlydjia
Summary: "No," Kurt said, grabbing the top of Blaine's head and moving it away from potential blowjob range. He turned, effectively cockblocking the kneeling Blaine. "Not until I can grab your head and not feel the need shatter it with a hammer." One-shot, fluff.


"Back away from the hair product, Blaine."

He frowned, finger almost touching the opaque substance in the jar. He twirled it around, drawing swirls on top of it, before sticking it in and grabbing a large clump. The goo folded over, forming a perfect point before Blaine expertly slathered it over his hands, and began applying the product to his soft curls in an act of defiance.

"Damnit, Blaine! I said back away. And that's not even the right stuff to shellac your hair down to your scalp," Kurt was exasperated. He'd seen Blaine's hair free of gel and pomade and whatever else he put in it; it was soft, with just the right amount of curls. It also had smelled divine, though Kurt didn't mind the coconut smell of Blaine's hair product. It was hot, he had to admit. He had to restrain himself from constantly running his fingers through it.

"What is?" he asked.

"Cement." Kurt deadpanned. "Here, let me."

Kurt attempted to grab his boyfriend's hand out of the jar, while Blaine attempted taming the unruly mop on his head. They fought for a moment, Kurt may be taller than Blaine, but he wasn't quite as strong. Finally, he was able to snatch his wrist, slowly guiding it down to his side, away from any pomade, gel, or mousse. It was a difficult task; Blaine had spread Kurt's variety of hair products all over his vanity. Hey, a boy had to be prepared for any hair catastrophe.

"No," Kurt said bluntly, "I like it soft."

"But it's a mess!" Blaine whined. "And your hair is always so perfect and styled but still natural. And you don't even try. It's not fair!" Blaine's lips contorted into a pout. He got onto his knees, still holding Kurt's hands, and pleaded upwards. He let go, and started toying with the lower buttons on Kurt's shirt, moving down to the top of his skinny jeans.

"No," Kurt said, grabbing the top of Blaine's head and moving it back, away from potential blowjob range. He swatted his hands away, and turned, effectively cockblocking the kneeling Blaine. "Not until I can grab your head and not feel the need shatter it with a hammer."

"It's not that bad," Blaine snorted, self consciously reaching up to pet his severe part, and tamed curls.

"It could survive nuclear fallout, and not a hair would be out of place."

Blaine tapped the clump of curls above his forehead experimentally. They didn't move. _Hmm, _he thought, _maybe my boyfriend's right._

Suddenly Kurt got an idea. "You. Go shower. I'll do your hair right."

"Come with me?" Blaine winked, and saw Kurt blush.

"No sir. I must prepare my battle station." He puttered around the room, cleaning things. Kurt grabbed a tie that hadn't made it back into his closet for some reason, eyeing it up and holding it in front of Blaine.

"You're not going to strap me down are you?" Blaine made a face, knowing full well that Kurt would tie him down with something if he didn't cooperate.

"Will you protest?" Kurt smirked, knowing how protective he was over his hair.

Blaine thought a moment then shrugged, "Probably."

"Then I might have to. I want free reign."

"But… I won't be dapper anymore."

"My vanity? My rules. Anyway, you don't have to look dapper to be sexy."

Blaine harrumphed. "Fine. But you have to watch a football game with me. And I get movie choice for the next three dates."

That sly bastard, he must have known Kurt wanted to have a musical marathon. "Deal," Kurt said.

"I'm not going to look ridiculous am I? I don't want to be laughed at on the street," Blaine loved Kurt, but he was a bit more flamboyant than he was really comfortable with, for his own style.

"What else is your fabulous gay boyfriend for? All your fashion needs, right here. Cheapest prices in Lima. You, go shower," Kurt said, shoving him out the door. "You might not go out on the street for a while though," he mumbled when Blaine was in the hallway.

"What was that?" Blaine yelled from the bathroom.

"Nothing! Nothing at all," Kurt replied, giggling at his own innuendo. He continued putting away his strongest hair products, and leaving only a select few in easy reach of the vanity.

Fifteen minutes later, Blaine emerged from the bathroom. His hair was spiked all over the place from his attempts to dry it; he looked like someone stuck his finger in an electrical socket. The cutest half smile formed on his lips when he saw the vanity. There was a decided lack of any hair products, save for two small bottles.

"Sit."

And he sat, or was forced to by a strong hand on his shoulder. Kurt hovered over him, blow drying, and combing. Under his boyfriend's practiced hand, Blaine's curls tamed. They didn't stick out at awkward angles, like they were prone to. They didn't lay too flat, or were held in place by copious amounts of gel.

"You're magic," Blaine whispered, hands reaching up to touch his hair. "Never in a billion years could I do that."

"You could, if I taught you. Careful, though. I get bitchy when people touch my hair dryer," Kurt patted it protectively, as Blaine made a pass at it. "Don't touch. I'm almost done."

"Magic," Blaine repeated. He had to admit, his boyfriend had the touch.

"I'm allowed to say 'I told you so' here, right?" Kurt laughed as he gently misted finishing spray on top of Blaine's hair. He ran his fingers through it, stopping to define a few curls right on his forehead. "Voila!"

Blaine went to finger his curls again, but before he could, Kurt slapped his wrist.

"Only I can mess it up now," he said, reaching down slightly to kiss Blaine's lips, smiling. He reached behind Blaine's head, pulling him closer. Kurt felt fingers in his own hair, trailing down his neck, and sending shivers down his spine. Blaine's tongue slipped into his mouth and Kurt gently pulled away.

"I wasn't done yet!" Blaine whined. Kurt laughed, and suddenly his mouth was otherwise occupied.

"You're cute when you want me kissing you, you know that?" Kurt was panting a little, his heart fluttering. Even after a few months, and plenty of kissing, Blaine still gave him butterflies. "Ugh, your hair is a mess now."

"Time for a lesson?" Blaine asked, running his hands down Kurt's arms, and then grabbing his hands. He lifted them up and brushed his lips against his knuckles. Kurt blushed endearingly.

"There's stuff in your hair," he said.

Blaine pulled him out the door and into the hallway. "We'll just have to take another shower, then."

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Yay for fluffy one-shots! This is an edited version of something I put on my tumblr a few weeks ago. I'll probably end up reworking a lot of stuff that I put on there, so be forewarned.**


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